FML! Share/Find/Copy stories and HAVE FUN!

[M.D.House]

Hello everyone. You should know about Fuck My Life, right?

Well, here you can share or just copy/paste your favorite FML story!

Official site link: http://www.fmylife.com

I will started the topic:


Copy/Paste Stories:


"Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML"

"Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML" ;D

"Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML"

"Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML"

"Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML"


Your turn...

M.D.House Reviewed by M.D.House on 7th Oct 2011. FML! Share/Find/Copy stories and HAVE FUN! Hello everyone. You should know about Fuck My Life, right? Well, here you can share or just copy/paste your favorite FML story! Official site link: http://www.fmylife.com I will started the topic: Copy/Paste Stories: Rating: 5

[cvrle77]

Today, I found out that every story on FML starts with 'Today'. Someone is always living todays day. FML.

[rkze1]

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to be a diplomat, I slowly say "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

lol

[softleaks]

FML: Feed My Llama
FML: Froot My Loop
FML: Find My Liver
FML: Forgot My Lunch

[M.D.House]

Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML